A funny collection of Twas The Night Before Christmas parodies


  Cross Dressing Night Before Christmas

Posted to alt.fashion.crossdressing by Shae Guerin (shae@tic.ab.ca) on 2002-12-23.
'Twas the night before Christmas, and all thru the house
I was making my plans to look more like my spouse
I carefully laid out my very best clothes
My bra and my panties, my slip and my hose

My stockings weren't hung by the chimney tonite
They were on me instead, feeling sensually tight
My dress was of velvet, a burgundy red
And on my long nails a new polish was spread

With makeup and jewelry, high heels on my feet
I was looking so sexy, and feeling so sweet
When out in the yard there arose such a noise
That I sprang from my bedroom, forgetting my poise

The moon on the snow with it's brilliant white glitter
Reminds me of lace, to set my heart a-twitter
When what to my long-lashed eyes should appear
But a person in red with a sleigh and reindeer

But I couldn't tell, was it a 'he' or a 'she'
The one with the pack was dressed somewhat like me
There in the sleigh was this 'cutsey' old flirt
With a white wig and makeup, a red blouse and skirt

The reindeer were sparkling, with rhinestones and pearls
And their antlers in ribbons, so they all looked like girls
When s/he stepped from the sleigh, to my eyes were revealed
Her knee-hi black boots with their seven-inch heels

Santa just blushed, but I stood there and smiled
And said, "Hello, my dear, can you stay for awhile?"
"Well you finally caught me", he said with a pout
"At this time on Christmas, folks are seldom about."

"I don't go enfemme very ofen at home,
Mrs Clause doesn't like it, so I do it alone.
"So when I give out goodies to make others smile
"I like to feel pretty and femme for awhile."

"So I ride off dressed up, from my hi-heels to wig,
"On Christmas eve night while I'm doing my gig."
I said, "Don't worry Santa, your secret is safe
Why don't you come in and just freshen your face."

We sat and we talked and vented our passion
For feminine frills and the latest new fashions
We finally parted with a hug and a kiss
S/he said, "I must go now, or some children I'll miss"

I went to my party and had a great time
With music and laughter and good food and wine
But when I returned and looked under my tree
I found some new pretties from sweet Santa to me

Lacy panties, a bra and a soft satin blouse
Perfumes and some candles to light up my house
But it wasn't the goodies that swept away my blues
It was knowing that Santa was a crossdresser too

So next time don't judge all the people you meet
By what they are wearing when out on the street
For in being onesself, there's no 'wrong or right'
Merry Christmas to all and to all a good night



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